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I was in my 30s at that point, and I said 'Hmm, you know, this is what I want.' And this guy had those qualities — many more good ones than bad ones.

" After pondering the data, a particular point stood out that the women in my sample (ranging in age from 63 to 108) wanted to pass on to those embarking on the relationship journey.

"Get to know that person very, very well in all circumstances, the happiness part and the stressful parts.

So both people have to be very willing and very open, and often times make concessions, as they get to know each other. You cannot mold your spouse into something that you want.'' Given the paramount importance of choosing carefully, it’s a good thing that these older women had specific advice for their younger counterparts.

When it comes to choosing a mate, I heard again and again: Choose carefully.

Looking back over their long experience, they believe some women are not careful enough.

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