How to bring up divorce when dating

Most kids will feel they're to blame even after parents have said that they're not.So it's vital for parents to keep giving this reassurance.Whether your kids express fear, worry, or relief about your separation and divorce, they'll want to know how their own day-to-day lives might change.

Sometimes stress comes out in other ways — at school, or with friends, or in changes to their appetite, behavior or sleep patterns.

So reassure them that it's OK to wish that mom and dad will reunite, but also explain the finality of your decisions.

Here are some ways to help kids cope with the upset of a divorce: Consistency and routine can go a long way toward providing comfort and familiarity that can help your family during this major life change.

As soon as you're certain of your plans, talk to your kids about your decision to live apart.

Although there's no easy way to break the news, if possible have both parents there for this conversation.

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    In re Marriage of Broday, supra , see also Ratarsky v. Nirider, supra (husband's failure to disclose pension to trial court did not rise to the level of extrinsic fraud, where wife was represented by counsel in the dissolution proceedings, and the husband was not, and she knew of the existence of the pension plan when her attorney drew up the separation agreement); Despain v. Lack of counsel, standing alone, is not enough to invalidate an otherwise valid decree. Brown, supra (divorce decree may not be set aside solely because the successful spouse failed to furnish counsel to the unsuccessful spouse without request); see also Jeffries v. Conversely, if a spouse was encouraged to seek independent counsel but did not do so, that fact will weigh against a finding of fraud. A divorcing individual who is an attorney will be particularly vulnerable to a later fraud claim if his or her spouse is not represented at the time when the property settlement agreement is executed. Webb, supra (husband's position as attorney and advisor to wife placed him in the category of one who continues in a special relationship with his wife, and, as such, he had an affirmative duty to make a full disclosure to wife as to the value of his pension). This was an impermissible collateral attack on the judgment, the court said, declaring that the wife's sole avenue of redress was to apply for modification of the divorce decree.

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